Good to know
In July 2021, Anna Akana uploaded a YouTube video titled after a New York Times article, ‘There’s a name for the blah you’re feeling’. It’s an introduction to languishing, the next hot pandemic-fuelled mood disorder, the new hire among old hats such as depression, anxiety and burnout.
It certainly resonated with me, a 20-something who had her arm raised, proudly poised to stake her flag into a life peak, only to land it in this mountain of poop called a pandemic.
In February 2020 I was fresh from a course-correcting journalism workshop in Tokyo, finally having realised what I might want to do in life. The coming years looked exciting. Then, as lockdowns forced us to focus the bulk of our energy towards merely adapting and surviving, that glowing chest of potential was forced shut with a resounding ‘click’.
But languishing can only persist for so long before it threatens to topple you overboard into depression, and so I realised that drastic measures were necessary for my long term wellbeing. It’s an indicator of the condition: the increased likelihood of cutting back on work. I paused my language learning. Took a semester off from uni. Deferred returning to my part time job. All actions taken from a position of immense privilege, to be sure. And all towards the purpose of prioritising my own mindfulness, reflection and connections between myself and the world.
Because, from a languishing perspective, in a locked down setting where one’s human interaction becomes dominated by one-way usage of social media, the enemy of comparison thrives.
Since that was the most obvious factor in my suffering, I looked to tackle that first. To use social media in the way that was intended: two-way, multi-way - socially. From divulging about my languishing online, I confirmed what social media wasn’t showing me before: that many in my social circles are feeling the same way. More importantly, I connected with some of those people on a deeper level.
I found that, while most are committed to sharing only their highlights - moving out, getting a new job, hooking up with that cutie they’ve been into - we can all languish in different ways. People who seem to be thriving are languishing in ways that I am not - something to be grateful for. Even so, how it feels to be languishing is universal (quote: “it makes me feel like a piece of shit”) - something else to be grateful for.
One friend said something that made me both laugh and think: “Good to know not everyone is thriving.”
Good to know not everyone is thriving. As paradoxical as it is - because I would never wish languishing upon those I care about - given the situation, I can’t help but feel glad to hear that they are.
If you’re experiencing signs of languishing I suggest checking out the NYT article mentioned, as the second half contains suggestions on how to get on top of it.
